Expert Article - Love On the Brain

“I hate to break it to you but what people call ‘love’ is just a chemical reaction that compels animals to breed” – Rick from Rick and Morty.

Have you ever been rejected by someone you love? If your answer is yes, then you know that love can hurt more than any physical wound. However, it may comfort you to know that you stand in the majority. When Helen Fisher asked this question in a study among college students, almost 90% responded affirmatively (The Brain in Love). Romantic love is a universal affliction that has existed in every known human society. It has inspired art, poetry, and wars. But what is love exactly? An evolutionary trick to motivate us to procreate? The consequence of Zeus ripping us apart so we are forever cursed to search for our other half? Scientific research suggests that love is actually just chemistry, and can be broken down into three components—lust, attraction, and attachment (Wu).

Lust

Lust is the component that stems from our evolutionary need to reproduce. The brain’s hypothalamus is responsible for creating the chemicals of lust: testosterone and estrogen. Testosterone, while generally perceived as a male hormone, can increase libido in both men and women. Women have also reported being more sexually motivated around ovulation, when estrogen levels are at their highest (Wu). However, anyone who has experienced love can tell you that lust and love are not the same. Testosterone and estrogen can’t explain the emotional intensity of being in love, or the gut-wrenching pain of love ending. These experiences can be accounted for by attraction and attachment.

Attraction

Many people see love as an emotion, or a constellation of emotions ranging from joy to despair. But as it turns out, love actually derives from a more primal core of our brain: the reward system. This means attraction is more of a goal-oriented drive than an emotion. When researchers used fMRI to study the brain activity of subjects who were described as “passionately in love”, they found high levels of activity in the Ventral Tegmental Area (VTA), which produces dopamine and disperses it to several areas in the brain (Fisher). Dopamine is a neurotransmitter that is known as a chemical of pleasure, and is essential to reward-motivated behaviors. When our reward centers are engaged, our brains can become addicted and dependent on the stimulation. Eating chocolate, doing cocaine, and being in love are all activities that trigger dopamine production—and are potentially addictive.

In fact, in a study conducted on recently romantically rejected individuals, they found similar brain activity between those subjects and individuals recovering from cocaine withdrawal. Specifically, three main areas were stimulated:

·      The VTA, responsible for motivation and reward.

·      The nucleous accumbens and frontal cortexes, associated with craving and addiction.

·      The insular cortex and anterior cingulate, associated with physical pain and distress (Nauert).

The addictive attributes of romantic love may explain the all-consuming nature of heartbreak.

When we fall in love, chemicals from the reward circuit flood our brain, producing a variety of physical and emotional responses. This is partly due to cortisol, the stress hormone, which also increases at the inception of romantic love (Edwards). The rise in cortisol levels depletes our serotonin, a chemical that is considered a natural mood stabilizer. Serotonin is known to help with eating, sleeping, reducing depression, and regulating anxiety. This may explain why love can cause appetite suppression and insomnia. Additionally, low levels of serotonin are also found in people who suffer from obsessive-compulsive disorder, which may relate to the obsessive and manic qualities of passionate love (Wu).

In one study, researchers examined the brain activity of subjects who were shown pictures of their loved partners. They found that an increase of activity in the brain’s romantic zones decreased activity in the amygdala and the frontal cortex. The amygdala is responsible for fear, and its deactivation implies a lessening of fear. The frontal cortex is responsible for enforcing judgmental criteria when we interact with people, and its deactivation indicates a lack of judgment (Zeki). Hence the adage, “love is blind”.

Attachment

While the chemicals of attraction may explain how we fall in love, why do we stay in love? This can be explained by attachment, which is driven by oxytocin. Oxytocin is frequently referred to as “the love hormone”, and induces feelings of content, calmness, and security. It plays a role in bonding through physical contact, and is released in large quantities during breastfeeding, childbirth, and sexual activity (Wu).

Oxytocin was first studied in prairie voles, an animal that mates for life. When the hormone is released during sex, it forges a bond between the male and the female. The prairie voles’ cousin, the Montana vole, does not share this brain circuitry and does not live a monogamous lifestyle. However, describing oxytocin as a love hormone is overly simplistic. In fact, oxytocin can be responsible for negative reactions such as jealousy, envy, and suspicion. In one study, men who were securely attached to their mothers described them more fondly after an oxytocin boost, but those with troubled relationships were even more critical with more oxytocin (Pappas). It may be that oxytocin simply amplifies social environments that already exist.

It is interesting to note that oxytocin can affect men and women in different ways. During sex, the woman produces large amounts of oxytocin that make them feel bonded during the interaction. For men, however, testosterone is produced, which inhibits oxytocin. Instead, men mostly get a rush of dopamine and pleasure, which can overshadow any feelings of affection. This could explain why women tend to get more emotionally attached through sexual intercourse (How Your Brain).

The Love Formula?

Although science has helped us gain a better understanding of what happens in our brains when we fall in love and get attached, we still don’t have an exact formula for figuring out love. We can’t control who our brain chooses to be attracted to, and we can’t control when people aren’t attracted to us. Maybe the best lesson we can learn from this is to be kinder to ourselves. The next time you get rejected just remember, it’s not you it’s the chemicals.

Works Cited

Edwards, Scott. “Love and the Brain.” On the Brain, Harvard Mahoney Neuroscience Institute, Mar. 2015, neuro.hms.harvard.edu/harvard-mahoney-neuroscience-institute/brain-newsletter/and-brain-series/love-and-brain.

Fisher, Helen E et al. “Intense, Passionate, Romantic Love: A Natural Addiction? How the Fields That Investigate Romance and Substance Abuse Can Inform Each Other” Frontiers in psychology vol. 7 687. 10 May. 2016, doi:10.3389/fpsyg.2016.00687

“How Your Brain Falls In Love.” Performance by Dawn Maslar, TED, YouTube, 5 July 2016, www.youtube.com/watch?v=eyq2Wo4eUDg.

Nauert, Rick. “Romantic Breakup Similar to Overcoming Addiction.” Psych Central, Psych Central.com, 8 Aug. 2018, psychcentral.com/news/2010/07/26/romantic-breakup-similar-to-overcoming-addiction/16019.html.

Pappas, Stephanie. “Love Drug? Oxytocin's Tender Effects Questioned.” LiveScience, Future Plc, 11 Feb. 2011, www.livescience.com/12833-love-hormone-oxytocin-dark-side.html.

“The Brain In Love.” Performance by Helen Fisher, TED, YouTube, 15 July 2008, www.youtube.com/watch?v=OYfoGTIG7pY&t=297s.

Wu, Katherine. “Love, Actually: The Science behind Lust, Attraction, and Companionship.” Science in the News, Harvard University, 14 Feb. 2017, sitn.hms.harvard.edu/flash/2017/love-actually-science-behind-lust-attraction-companionship.

Zeki, Semir. “The Neurobiology of Love.” FEBS Letters, vol. 581, no. 14, 2007, pp. 2575–2579., doi:10.1016/j.febslet.2007.03.094.